Moments with You
by DauntlessErudite29
Summary: One day in the hospital, a certain dark-haired teen catches John's eye. John learns that Sherlock has lung cancer as a result of smoking since he was fourteen, and that he has two years to live. As they grow close, they decide to make every moment that they have count. John/Sherlock AU. Warnings and everything inside
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Moments with You **

**Summary: One day in the hospital, a certain dark-haired teen catches John's eye. John learns that Sherlock has lung cancer as a result of smoking since he was fourteen, and that he has two years to live. As they grow close, they decide to make every moment that they have count. John/Sherlock AU. **

**Rated: M **

**Pairing(s): John/Sherlock, **

**Genre(s): Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Angst, Drama **

**Warning(s): Angst, teenager/adult relationship, intense kissing, sex, death, mentioning of underage smoking and drugs **

**AN: Okay, so I am honestly so nervous about posting this story because I've never really written anything like it before. But I was inspired by John Green's amazing novel _The Fault in Our Stars_ and a couple of amazing fanfics that I've read. So I hope you guys like it and read and review please! NO FLAMES but constructive criticism is approved. Also, I will be posting song lyrics at the beginning of each chapter that also inspired me while I was writing and I will write what the song is at the end of each chapter. Oh, and Sherlock is 16 in my story and John is 28. **

* * *

_I'm thinking 'bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways_

_Maybe just a touch of a hand _

_Well, me - I fall in love with you every single day _

_And I just wanna tell you I am _

* * *

I had been working at the hospital in London for a year when I passed his room. Sherlock's room. Usually I did rounds on patients, but I was taking over Mike Stanford's job, too, since he was out sick today. Mike worked in the morgue - obviously, since I hated the morgue - and to get to the morgue, you had to go down the cancer treatment part of the hospital.

I usually didn't go down that way. Normally I worked on the other side of the hospital. But since I was saving my friend's arse, I had to go all the way across the hospital and down to the basement to get to the morgue.

When I passed his room, I didn't regret a single second of it.

For some reason he had caught my attention. I'd passed rooms full of people who had cancer and were there to get treatment, but none of them made me stop just past the dark-haired teenager's room and look inside again. I knew that I was invading his privacy, but I couldn't help it. He was so beautiful. He had curly dark hair, beautiful blue eyes, and flawless pale skin. At the most, he was seventeen. Sixteen and a half, I guessed.

I knocked, almost shyly, and entered the room. "Hello," I said, trying not to blush. "I'm John."

The boy took one look at me and said, "You're not my doctor." His deep baritone voice startled me.

"Er, no," I agreed.

"So...why are you here, then?"

"I don't really know," I lied. _Because you're bloody gorgeous_, I wanted to say. It was such an awkward conversation I had gotten myself into that I held back a laugh. The boy started to chuckle a bit and then we started giggling as if we were lifelong friends.

"I'm Sherlock," he said.

"John," I informed him.

"You already said that."

Oh, boy. It was then that I recalled I had. A slightly awkward silence filled the room and I couldn't think of anything else to say. I kept thinking of something to say. _So, why are you here? Are you okay? Is there anything I can do to help you?_

"I know what you're thinking," Sherlock said, studying me suspiciously.

"What?"

"_'Oh, look at this poor kid, he has cancer.'_" His tone made my heart lurch. "_'I should probably see how he's doing.'_ I don't want _pity_, John."

"I-" I was speechless. "I'm sorry," was all I could think of to say. "But really, are you okay?"

"Well, I've got lung cancer," Sherlock told me. "I started smoking when I was fourteen and developed serious lung cancer about a year and a half ago. You tell me."

"I'm so sorry," I said. "How...how long..."

"How long do I have to live?" Sherlock finished. "Doctor said two years, at the most."

An incredible sadness filled me then. I had no idea what to say. "Well...I'm a doctor," I informed him. "If I can help you, in any way, I will."

Sherlock offered me a hint of a smile. "You can help me by staying," he said. "I could use some company."

* * *

We spent the next 2 hours getting to know each other. Sherlock told me about his older brother, Mycroft, who was, according to him, "the British government". Sherlock told me about his amazing power to deduce anything. He read my whole past by just looking at me, and the only thing that he got wrong was that Harry was my sister and not my brother. He also told me that he liked to play the violin. "You mind if I play right now?" he asked me.

Eager to hear him play, I said, "No, of course not. Go right ahead." I reached over to the nightstand and handed him his violin. He took it and smiled at me, and my heart skipped a beat.

He started to play and it was beautiful. As music filled the room, a couple walked in, followed by a tall man with a slight potbelly. "Sherlock, you've made a friend?" the woman who must have been Sherlock's mom said.

"Yes, Mom," Sherlock said. "This is John."

I stood and shook their hands. "John Watson," I said. "I work here at the hospital."

Sherlock's mother smiled. "Well, I'm glad he made a friend," she said. "I keep encouraging him to make more friends, but..." She shook her head. "Greg and Molly have tried to get him to go out more often, but he just doesn't want to."

"Mom! Stop embarrassing me!"

I couldn't help laughing.

Sherlock's family stayed for dinner and then they left. "Well, I better get going," I said, standing up.

"Wait," Sherlock said, looking up at me. "C-can we exchange numbers?"

I smiled. "Of course," I said. We put our numbers in each other's phones and I said, "I'll come back and visit you tomorrow, if you want me to."

"I think I would like that," Sherlock told me.

My heart fluttered yet again as I said goodbye to him and left.

* * *

**AN: The song was "Thinking Out Loud" by Ed Sheeran. Please review and tell me what you thought :) Updates soon**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Sorry it took me so long to update! I've had some writer's block with this story, so I didn't want to continue until I was sure what I wanted to do with this story. But now I have a basic plot formed, so here is the next chapter :) And also the lyrics that inspired me when I was writing this**

* * *

_'Cause I don't wanna lose you now_

_I'm looking right at the other half of me_

_The vacancy that sat in my heart_

_Is a space that now you hold_

* * *

Sherlock's PoV:

"This isn't fair," Greg said. "You should be allowed to go home at least, and live the remainder of your life. It's your birthday - why are they keeping you here? Why are they giving you tests?"

"It's fine," I said to one of my two best friends, Greg Lestrade. I kept the emotions off my face. I didn't want him knowing how disappointed I really was. My seventeenth birthday, and I was going to be spending it in the hospital. I would only have one or two birthdays left. The thought made me want to cry, but I didn't.

"Is John coming over?" Molly asked. I had known John for two weeks, and I had gotten to know him really well. We did stuff a lot, we watched mystery movies in my room, and I discovered that John liked murder mysteries as much as I did. I had been teaching him to play violin, though he was quite slow at it.

"Yes," I informed her. "You'll get to meet him."

"Is he, you know..." Molly grinned at me. "Is he cute?"

"What?" I hadn't thought of John like that. To avoid the question, I said, "He's nice."

"Well, that's good," she said, then turned to Greg. "Greg, do you want to give him his birthday presents now?"

"Of course." My other best friend took out a small gift from his backpack and handed it to me. I smiled, opened it and found three new mystery books that I've been wanting for a while, but never got for myself.

"Thanks!" I was genuinely excited. Greg knew me so well.

"No problem at all." Greg smiled back and looked at Molly, who had a smaller present with her. I opened it and found a beautiful key chain with a small violin dangling from it.

"It actually works if you play it," she told me, sounding pleased with herself. She showed me and I gasped, impressed.

"That is really cool." I tried it myself, and I already loved it. "Thanks."

"Happy birthday." She hugged me and then Greg gave me a quick hug before they left. During the time I spent alone waiting for John to get here, I read some of my book. A while later, I looked up as I saw him come behind the curtain of my room.

"Hi," I said, putting my book down on the table beside my bed.

"Hello." John smiled and sat down beside me on the bed. "Happy birthday."

"Thanks." I smiled back.

"So what do you want to do today?" John asked me.

"Not sure," I replied. "This place is quite dull - we've already done everything there is to do around here."

John's smile widened. "We could always watch this movie I found," he said matter-of-factly, holding up a rare movie that I have always wanted to watch again, but never found it anywhere, and then I got cancer and had to stay in the hospital so it was even harder to find. I'd told John about it, not ever expecting this.

My eyes lit up and I gasped. "You found it! How in the bloody-"

"It was at a store for older movies."

That made sense, as it was an older movie. I hugged John tight, feeling him jump slightly.

"It's the best birthday present ever. Thanks, John." I pulled back to find our faces inches apart.

John gasped and I leaned back against my pillows, fighting a blush. We watched the movie mostly in silence, with John making occasional comments or asking questions about the movie.

My birthday dinner included my parents, Mycroft, Molly, Greg, and John. Thankfully, Molly and Greg immediately liked John, asking him questions about him and me and what we usually did together. John kept glancing at me the whole time, and I swore he was blushing, but it was probably just a trick of the light, John had nothing to blush about.

He hugged me again when he left, the second time we'd ever hugged. "Happy birthday," he whispered, and when he left I instantly felt the loss of his arms around me, almost like it had physically punched me in the gut. I felt a sharp pang that I ignored and picked up the book that Greg had given me for my birthday. It had been a pretty good birthday, I had to admit, even in the hospital.

* * *

**AN: Hope you liked it! Updates soon - and the song was "Mirrors" by Justin Timberlake 3 **


	3. Chapter 3

_So one last time_

_I need to be the one who takes you home_

_One more time_

_I promise after that I'll let you go_

* * *

John's PoV:

About a week after Sherlock's birthday, I was working when I heard a commotion down the hall.

"Sherlock Holmes," a nurse said.

"Yes, we need to get him into the OR, now," another nurse replied.

I panicked, jumping up from my desk with my heart in my throat. I went over to them and asked, "What's going on?"

"Sherlock Holmes has developed a new cancer tumor," she informed me. I froze in terror. This was so unfair.

"Will he be okay?!" I demanded, probably a bit rudely, looking back on it now.

"We're not completely sure, but we have our best surgeons operating on him." She looked at me quizzically, probably puzzled by my burst of emotion for a patient. "Do you-"

"Know him? Yes, I do. He's my friend," I said.

"Good," she said, to my surprise. "He needs all the support he can get right now. Praying does help, you know."

I smiled at her. She was friendly - and pretty, I had to admit - and a few months ago, I'd probably have asked her out. But I had my heart set on someone else now, someone who I was sure didn't like me back, and who I couldn't really have anyway. "Thanks."

"Of course." She hurried off down the hall, probably towards Sherlock's room. I couldn't concentrate on my work the rest of the night, even with the nurse coming back every hour to give me updates on the surgery. _Sherlock, don't you bloody die on me_, I thought, tears filling my eyes as I stared helplessly at my computer. _Please. I love you-_

Oh no.

I'd known I liked Sherlock, but love? This was a whole new level of bad. _You're a bloody pervert, John_, I told myself. _In love with a sixteen year old. _

But I knew it was true, after the times we had now shared together, the memories, the things we had in common. I loved Sherlock.

* * *

I was allowed to go see Sherlock in his room after the surgery. I rushed in, tired from staying later than usual at the hospital, but I didn't care. "Sherlock, oh my God, are you okay?" I all but threw myself down in the chair beside him.

He narrowed those beautiful blue eyes at me suspiciously. "You've been crying."

I laughed through my tears. Same old Sherlock. "You are okay," I realized.

He smiled knowingly, as if he knew what I'd been thinking. "I feel fine now."

"Thank God." Without thinking, I reached over and put my hand over his. He gasped at the same time I did. "You had me worried sick, Sherlock."

That was the first time I ever saw Sherlock cry. It startled me, and I squeezed his hand tightly. "I was so scared, John. I thought I was going to die-"

"It's okay," I reassured him. "You're okay. You're okay now. You're fine." I sat down on the bed beside him and pulled him into my arms, letting him cry into my shoulder. Every part of me longed to find out if those lips were as delicious as they looked, but I settled on running my hand across his silky black curls. They were so soft.

Sherlock eventually fell asleep with me holding him, and the last thing I wanted to do was get up. I let myself fall into a deep sleep, resting my cheek on the top of his head.

* * *

Despite having slept at the hospital, I got a good night's sleep and only woke up once, to someone changing the bag of water by Sherlock's bed. The nurse smiled at me knowingly, and I realized with a start that it was the nurse I'd talked to earlier. Sherlock never stirred and I fell back asleep shortly after.

I went to work early, the first one who showed up, for once. And when I went to see Sherlock on my lunch break, he had his expression all composed like nothing had happened between us last night. I tried to keep my own hurt feelings inside me like he was doing.

"John..." I looked up from my thoughts. "Thank you for last night."

Oh. I hadn't expected that. "Of course," I replied.

He went to get X-rays after that to make sure everything was okay. I stayed as close to him as I was allowed, which meant waiting right outside the room.

"John, will you get me my violin?" he asked me when he was wheeled back to his room.

I reached over to where it leaned against the wall and passed it to him. Beautiful music filled the room. I'd never heard this song before, but it was remarkably good and different from the ones he usually played, more emotional. It was slow and beautiful and bittersweet, and my vision soon blurred with tears.

Sherlock finished. "What do you think?" he asked me.

"I think that was absolutely beautiful," I told him, smiling.

"Good," he said, putting the violin down. "I was hoping you'd say that, as I wrote it for you."

Startled, and touched, I asked, "You wrote me a song? Why?"

"Because I want you to see past what people usually think about me," he admitted. "They call me a freak for deducing things about them. They say I have no emotion, that I don't have friends."

"Well, they obviously don't know you then," I said firmly. "And I already do see you, Sherlock. You're amazing."

Sherlock looked surprised, for once. His expression softened and he studied me with those intelligent blue eyes. My stomach did flip flops like a lovesick teenager, and for the millionth time I wondered if Sherlock felt the same about me. Probably not.

"I - I really care about you, you know," I said bravely, swallowing nervously.

He reddened slightly and looked away almost shyly. "I care about you, too, John."

We looked at each other for a few moments and his blue eyes widened. I cleared my throat just as Sherlock's parents came in. "Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Holmes," I said.

They greeted me with smiles and a handshake. They were friendly people, and I could definitely see the resemblance that Sherlock had to them. Mycroft was not with them this time, and I figured he was probably working. I couldn't help being relieved - I wasn't sure if he liked me or not.

I chatted with Sherlock's parents for a while, asking them about the surgery and the X-rays. Thankfully, all seemed well now, with the tumor removed. I tried covering up just how relieved I was. It would be bad enough if Sherlock knew about my feelings for him, but if his parents knew? I didn't want to think about the consequences of my attraction to him if it got out. I'd probably be fired.

His parents left after a while, and Sherlock and I sat together alone. "Wasn't your lunch break over a long time ago?" he asked me.

I looked at my watch. "Crap!" I jumped up from my seat and heard Sherlock's laughter all the way to the elevator. _Bloody git for laughing at me_, I thought as I hurried back to my work.

* * *

"Will you go out with me?"

"What?" I asked. I was talking to the nurse I had talked to the other day. "Why?"

"Because you're cute," she said. "I like you." She smiled.

"Yes," I said. It wasn't like Sherlock would ever return my feelings, and I needed to move on, for both of us. But then I realized something. "What's your name, by the way?" I asked her, laughing nervously.

She laughed, too. "Sarah," she told me.

"Okay. Great," I said. "How does tonight sound? I get off work early."

"Sounds great." She gave me her number. I smiled and said I would text her, then returned to my work.

* * *

**AN: Hope you liked this chapter! The song was "One Last Time" by Ariana Grande **


	4. Chapter 4

_Loving can hurt_

_Loving can hurt sometimes_

_But it's the only thing that I know_

_When it gets hard_

_You know it can get hard sometimes_

_It is the only thing that makes us feel alive_

* * *

Sherlock's PoV:

"What do you mean, you have a date tonight?" I asked, surprisingly hurt and jealous.

"Yep," he said proudly. "With that nurse, Sarah."

"With _my_ nurse Sarah?" That would definitely be awkward next time I saw her. Wonderful. "Oh. So...you're happy, then."

"I'm getting there." He blushed. "Though I was in love with someone else for a while."

"Oh," I said again, disappointed. "Who?"

He looked at me strangely. "Nobody."

"You know I can read you like a book, John," I lied - sort of. Usually I could, but this time I was lost.

"Good for you, you bloody git."

I'll admit I laughed at him. "That's the best you've got?"

John just rolled his eyes at me. "I thought it was pretty good," he teased. "Well, I've got to go get ready for my date. Try not to be too much of a git while I'm gone."

"I won't try very hard."

I shook my head fondly at him as he left. I wondered where he was taking Sarah tonight. Usually if Greg or Molly went on dates, their clothes told me where they were going. But I didn't know where John was going, because he wasn't in his date clothes yet.

I wished I could spy on them, but since I couldn't leave the hospital, I decided to text Molly to ask her to do it.

_Would be much appreciated if you could do me a favor tonight. I'd owe you. - SH _

_What kind of favor? _

_I need you to spy on John for me. He's going on a date tonight. - SH _

_And you're jealous? ;)_

I felt my face heat up at that. Was I jealous that John got to go on a date with a girl, who was actually pretty? I was stuck in the hospital with cancer, unable to have a proper love life while my friend got a girlfriend.

Would John kiss her? I wondered if he was the type to kiss after a first date. I imagined John pulling her close, kissing her. He'd probably smell like that nice cologne he usually wore, as his lips brushed against mine...

Uh oh. This was not supposed to happen. I realized that the image I'd envisioned of John kissing Sarah, had turned into John kissing me. "Oh my God," I gasped. I wasn't jealous of John. I was jealous of _Sarah_.

I was in love with John.

* * *

"Do you see him?" I asked Molly later that night, over the phone.

"Yes. They're walking into the movie. I'm following," Molly informed me. "You do realize I'm going to have to turn my phone off for the movie, right?"

"Why couldn't John just have taken her out to dinner, where phones were allowed?" I asked.

"Allowed, but not socially appropriate on a date," Molly reminded me.

Right. Like I'd ever been on a date. This was awful. My realization for my love for John had hit me hard. He was never going to return my feelings, especially not when he had a perfectly decent girl now. Why did she have to be so bloody pretty? And nice? it would have been a lot easier to hate her if she was ugly and mean. No way John would ever choose me over her. Not that it mattered. I was 11 years younger than him and our relationship would be illegal. Not even mentioning I only had a couple years to live. Maybe less.

Why was life so unfair?

I brushed tears from my eyes. I hadn't felt this much emotion for someone in a long time. I remembered how John had held me the night of my surgery, as I slept, and how safe I had felt with him. How I always missed him when he was gone, like right now. I always felt a sort of absence while I was gone, like a hole that only filled up when he was there.

For the first time ever, I wondered what it would be like to kiss him, to be that close to him, to have his face press up against mine, our lips touching...

I gasped, putting my fingers against my lips as if it had actually happened. My heart fluttered.

"Sherlock? Everything okay?" Molly asked from my phone.

I jumped. To be honest, I had forgotten that she was still on the phone. "Yes, everything's fine. What are they doing now?"

"Sitting down in the movie theater."

"Are there a lot of people there?"

"Yes."

"Good."

* * *

Molly turned off her phone for the movie, and I found myself pouring out a new song. It was slow and sad, like the one I played for John, but this one had new meaning to it, a new sound. I wondered if I should play this one for John.

Just as I finished, Molly called me back, and she said, "Sherlock, they kissed. I'm really sorry."

My heart sank and tears filled my eyes. "It's okay, Molly," I said. "Thank you. I'm sure you had plans tonight."

"I didn't, actually, and the movie was really good. Your boyfriend has good taste." Before I could reply to that, she said, "Do you want me to come over?"

"No, I'm fine," I said. "Really. Good night." I hung up, disappointed. It seemed like John's date had gone well.

Of course, I was going to have to do something about that, wasn't I?

* * *

**AN: Cliffhanger! Hahaha I love writing those. The song was "Photograph" by Ed Sheeran. Hope you liked this chapter! Updates soon :) **


	5. Chapter 5

_This is new_

_Feels unused _

_I've never met anyone like you_

_Frightening_

_Feeling naked _

_Sense in searching something sacred_

* * *

John's PoV:

I knew I should have felt nervous about seeing Sarah at work the next day, especially after our kiss last night. But I didn't feel anything during the kiss, and I actually had pretended I was kissing a certain dark-haired boy. It was so wrong, but I couldn't help it.

When I walked over to the cancer wing on my break to see Sherlock, I heard voices coming from inside the room. "...know the date was just a distraction for him, right?" Definitely Sherlock's deep, velvety baritone voice.

"What do you mean?"

Sarah's voice. Pressing closer to the wall, curious, I listened to their conversation. "John told me himself that he's in love with someone else," Sherlock said. "I wouldn't waste your time dating someone who isn't interested in you."

_What? _Oh, Sherlock was _so_ going to get it for this. What in the bloody hell was he trying to accomplish by saying these things to Sarah?

Unless he...

_No_, I told myself, firmly. I refused to get my hopes up. I couldn't just assume that, and it's not like I could ask him.

I stormed in the room, furious that Sherlock was ruining my relationship that had just barely started. Sarah saw me as I came in, paled, and quickly left the room. "What did you say to her?" I asked.

"You know what I said," Sherlock said, not even having the decency to look embarrassed. In fact, he seemed smug. "You were standing right outside the door."

I wanted to punch him. Of course he knew I had eavesdropped. "You ruined my _one_ chance at finding love, Mr. I-Know-Everything!" I yelled at him. "Apologize to Sarah _now_."

"I would," he said, "but it wouldn't be sincere."

I gave him my best death glare. "Well, _make_ it sincere, you smug git."

The corner of Sherlock's mouth turned up in a smile. He was actually laughing at me. "I didn't ruin your one chance at love, John."

"What in the _bloody_ hell are you talking about?"

"I need to tell you something. I'm-"

There was a knock at the door then, and his parents and Mycroft came in. I blushed, trying to wipe the anger off my face in front of Sherlock's family. "Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Holmes," I said. "Mycroft." He nodded at me. I still couldn't tell if he liked me.

"Nice to see you again, John," said Sherlock's mom. "We have some amazing news for Sherlock, if you would like to stay."

"Of course." I gave Sherlock a "We'll finish this later" look, because I didn't want to fight with his family there, and I sat down in the chair beside his bed to listen to his parents.

"We just found out about this experiment in Paris," his mother announced. "Sherlock, if this experiment is successful, it could make you live for a long time."

I looked at Sherlock, my heart swelling with pure happiness. All my anger over our fight vanished, at least for now. I almost laughed when I saw that Sherlock's mouth had fallen open. He hadn't been able to deduce _this_, had he? "Sherlock, that's fantastic!" I felt so many emotions at once. Happiness, love, curiosity, worry, excitement, anticipation. The boy I loved could live. And we could-

No, I reminded myself, we still couldn't. That didn't change our age difference. And it wasn't like Sherlock felt the same way about me. I still had to keep my feelings for him a secret.

"When are you guys going?" I asked. "They should start as soon as possible!"

His mom smiled at me. "The experiment starts in two days, so we're leaving tomorrow," she told me.

"I want John to come," Sherlock said. Four pairs of eyes turned to look at him, including mine. Then Sherlock's family looked at me, and I blushed._ Smooth, John. They'll never suspect anything._

"You're welcome to come if you'd like," his father said, looking at Mrs. Holmes for approval. She nodded in agreement.

"Of course," I said, looking at Sherlock. He smiled at me, and although I thought it was still wrong that he'd said those things to Sarah, I knew then that I'd approached him in the wrong way. I'd been a total ass to him. Suddenly, I felt really bad for yelling at him. In that moment, I also felt really young.

I smiled back at Sherlock. "I would _love_ to come."

* * *

**AN: Hope you liked it! The song was "Atlantis" by Ellie Goulding. Updates soon :) **


	6. Chapter 6

_Kiss me, ki-ki-kiss me_

_Infect me with your love and _

_Fill me with your poison_

_Take me, ta-ta-take me_

_Wanna be your victim_

_Ready for abduction _

* * *

Sherlock's PoV:

I was nervous for John to come over to my house that night. Our flight to Paris was at 6 the next morning, and John was staying with us overnight. More specifically, he would be staying with me in my room, in my bed.

So I was also very excited as I looked in my closet, trying to find something decent to wear. John and I were going to see a movie and then we were going to Angelo's, which was my favorite restaurant. I personally knew Angelo, the owner of the restaurant, and we were good friends. I couldn't wait to introduce him to John.

I finally decided on wearing my purple, button-down shirt. I showered, and brushed my teeth again - not that that was necessary - and was done just in time to hear the doorbell ring.

"Wow." John's eyes widened when he saw me. He had a suitcase beside him and a backpack on his back. He blushed, cleared his throat and said, "I mean, hi."

_What was that?_ I wondered. John's pupils were dilated, and usually that was a telltale sign of attraction. He couldn't possibly be.

_No_. I wouldn't get my hopes up, when I would just get heartbroken. Besides, John probably still liked Sarah.

"Ready to go?" John asked me.

"Yes," I answered. I showed him into my room where he put his stuff, and we left.

We went to see the second "Mission Impossible" movie, and the whole time I very badly wanted to rest my head on John's shoulder. Halfway through the movie, I finally managed to work up enough courage to do just that. John didn't do anything to stop me, so I figured it was all right, and I made another daring move - I put my hand over his. He didn't stop this, either, much to my surprise. What was going on here?

After the movie, we went to Angelo's. It felt a lot like a date, especially with the romantic mood that the restaurant gave off. When we walked in, Angelo noticed how close John and I were walking together, and he put a candle in the middle of the table, saying, "It's more romantic."

I felt my face heat up and looked over at John to see him blushing furiously. "I'm not his date!" John called, earning the attention of a few of the other people in the restaurant. I couldn't help smirking.

"What's so funny, git?" John shoved me playfully after we had sat down together in the booth, me close beside him.

"You," I answered honestly, smiling at him.

John smiled back, but then his expression turned serious. "Listen, I'm sorry for yelling at you in the hospital earlier," he apologized, to my surprise. "That wasn't the way I should have handled that."

I quickly swallowed the "I love you" on my tongue, and I said, "It's all right, John."

"No, it's not," he rambled on. "I shouldn't have-"

I grabbed his hand, lacing our fingers together, which quickly shut him up. "_John_. I forgive you." I squeezed his hand reassuringly and he blushed. I figured I should probably say I was sorry too, for saying that to Sarah, but since I didn't mean it, I knew I shouldn't lie to John. Not that I wasn't already doing that. I just couldn't have any more lies than was necessary.

John smiled at me. "Good." I so badly wanted to kiss him then, with the candlelight reflecting in his gorgeous eyes. We looked at each other for a moment without saying anything, his thumb brushing over my fingers, making it hard for me to breathe. I glanced down at his lips, but we were interrupted by Angelo, who brought us our food.

He then noticed how close we were sitting together. "Sorry, did I interrupt something?" He smiled knowingly and winked at me as he left us alone.

John's blush deepened and he averted his eyes as we started to eat. "So, this test," he said to me as we started eating. "How much longer could you live? Your whole life?"

"I'm not sure," I admitted, with some reluctance. "My parents gave me very little information about it. I did some research, of course, but couldn't find much."

"This is an amazing opportunity, you know," John said.

"Of course I know." I smiled. "I'll cherish every year I get. Every day. Every second." _Especially if you get to be in it_, I thought to myself.

John's face was as red as a tomato now and he took up a sudden interest in the floor. I must have said that out loud, I realized, mortified.

We finished our meal, and by the time we got back to my house, it was late. We had a 6 am flight the next morning with testing following the day after, and I was exhausted after a long day today. After getting ready for bed, I got under my covers beside John. It felt so good to be sleeping in my own bed after almost a year in the hospital, not hooked up to any IVs or bags of liquid. I realized that if this test was successful, I might be able to finally move out of the hospital.

"John," I murmured quietly. "Are you still awake?"

"I am," he answered. "Everything all right?"

My thoughts wandered to the night that he held me as I slept. "I...I want to be close to you," I admitted. "Like that night." I was glad for the dark so that John couldn't see my blush.

"Of course," John said, to my relief. "Come here." I smiled and moved over the small distance to where John lay, settling in his arms. He wrapped his arms around me, one hand moving down to my waist, his fingers running over my hip bone. I could barely breathe.

I swallowed, laying perfectly still in his arms, my head on his chest as he touched me. I think that was the last straw. "John," I breathed.

"Yes?" He sounded concerned.

I lifted my head, finding his lips with mine in the darkness. John gasped, but he didn't pull away from the kiss. He reached his hand into my hair and I moaned before I could stop myself, letting all the emotions that I'd been holding back into the kiss. His lips were so soft, so warm, and just as delicious as I'd imagined. I practically melted.

It was a long kiss. I guess you could say it was even like we were making out. We kissed deeply, softly, our lips brushing lovingly against each other's over and over. It was my first kiss, and I wasn't experienced, but John seemed to be and he led me through it, teaching me. His tongue brushed mine, and my heart pounded in my chest, so loud in my ears that I was sure John could hear it, too. He slid his hand farther up my shirt, his fingers sliding over my bare skin. I couldn't breathe at all now, but that was okay. Oxygen was overrated.

John was the one to pull away. "I'm too old for you," he said.

"I don't care," I told him, my voice firmer than I had expected. "I love you."

I leaned in to kiss him again, but he refused. "You shouldn't."

My heart sank in disappointment. "But I do," I insisted. His hand was still stroking my hair, and it drove me crazy. "_Please_, John." I had never sounded so desperate, so vulnerable, in front of another person like this before, and I was embarrassed. But I _wanted_ him, every part of me wanted him, longed for him, ached to have those lips back on mine like the world would end if we didn't kiss again.

"I love you, too, Sherlock." Tears of relief filled my eyes. He held me close and I buried my face in his chest, sure that I had never loved someone as much as I loved him right now. "Get some sleep, okay? It's late, and we have a long flight tomorrow."

I nodded. I didn't get my second kiss, but I relaxed in his arms and was happier than I had been in a long, long time as I fell asleep in John's arms.

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**AN: They finally kissed! Let me know what you thought about this chapter :) Hope you liked it and updates soon! The song was "E.T." by Katy Perry **


	7. Chapter 7

**Guest: Haha yep! I often feel the same when my OTPs get together - they usually don't, but there is always fanfiction :) **

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John's PoV:

I woke up at around 4 the next morning, with Sherlock still sleeping in my arms. A warm, pleasant feeling settled in my stomach, and I kissed his forehead and stroked his curls. "John..." He snuggled closer to me, wrapping his arms tighter around me. Tears of happiness filled my eyes, and I pulled him closer. There was no way that I'd ever have considered that Sherlock felt the same way about me, and it was amazing. That kiss had been amazing, and so worth waiting for for so long.

I knew I was going to hell for it, though. At the very least, I was going to get in trouble if anyone found out. I'd probably be fired for being romantically involved with not only a minor, but a patient from the hospital that I worked at. It was also against the law to be in a relationship with a minor. And Sherlock had just turned seventeen. Fantastic.

I lay there for a while with Sherlock in my arms, but then I decided it was time to get up since I couldn't sleep and the alarm was set to go off at 4:15 anyway. I stumbled into the bathroom and showered quickly, and was at the table with Sherlock's parents and Mycroft eating a bowl of cereal when Sherlock finally came out of his room.

"Honey, have some breakfast before we leave," his mom encouraged him as he went to sit down on the couch, turning on the TV to watch "Forensic Files".

Sherlock sighed and got up, getting a bowl of cereal for himself and sitting down beside me. Awkward, as you can probably imagine. I hoped that his parents didn't notice something different between us as Sherlock cleared his throat and I blushed.

"Good morning," I said to him.

"Morning." He took small bites of his cereal.

After a very uncomfortable breakfast, we went to the airport. After getting our bags checked and going through security, we barely made it to the gate before our flight left. It had already been a long morning, and I couldn't believe it was only 6. It felt like it should be noon.

Sherlock and I took one side of the aisle while Sherlock's parents and Mycroft took the other. I sat down close beside him so that our shoulders touched, me letting him have the window seat as more passengers boarded the airplane. We didn't say a word during the whole take off routine - which I always found rather annoying - and in fact, we hadn't said much to each other the whole morning. Though when he reached over and put his hand over mine, I smiled at him, and he smiled back.

It took about another fifteen minutes for the plane to take off and everyone to get completely settled in for the next few hours. Sherlock murmured to me, "Thanks for another wonderful night, John."

I knew he had to have planned that out, because I immediately flushed with embarrassment, praying to God no one had heard that. Fortunately, we had the aisle seat to ourselves, and Sherlock's voice had been so quiet that it was unlikely Mycroft or their parents had heard. "The way you just said that, you made it sound like we just had sex." I kept my voice low, as well, although it didn't make this conversation any less embarrassing. But I knew we had to talk about the kiss we had shared last night.

"Do you want to have sex?" A mischievous grin formed on Sherlock's face, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to smack or kiss it off him. A damn infuriating boy he could be sometimes.

"If I did, I could get into serious trouble," I reminded him. "I could be fired from my job, and I could also go to prison for being in a romantic relationship with a minor."

"Then we'll tell people when I turn eighteen," he said, then added, "If I ever turn eighteen."

The thought was so horrifying that I bit my lip to keep from crying. It was so easy to forget that Sherlock had cancer, and when I was reminded of it, it really hit me hard. Sherlock was so full of life, it was hard to believe that he was really sick. "_Don't_ talk like that," I said dangerously, scaring myself, and even him as well, because those gorgeous blue eyes widened and he shrank into his seat. "You will. I believe in you. You're strong, and beautiful, and amazing."

"Is that why you kissed me back when I kissed you last night?" Sherlock asked me.

I blushed at the acknowledgement of the kiss. "Of course."

"I was so scared, John," Sherlock admitted. "I was scared you wouldn't love me back. But it felt so good when you touched me, that I just...I just lost control."

I instantly knew the perfect line for this, and I didn't hesitate in the slightest after all the embarrassing jokes he'd said to me. "Just couldn't keep your hands off me, could you?" I flashed him a flirtatious smile, and laughed at him when he turned as red as a tomato.

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At the hotel in Paris, Sherlock and I were sharing a room together while Mycroft and his parents took the other room. It was a nice hotel, with a California king bed and a large bathroom. It also had a terrace outside with a view of the Eiffel Tower. It was absolutely beautiful.

"This is amazing," I said after putting my stuff down by the closet. "I don't think I've ever stayed in a place this nice before." The duvet comforter was soft, and after only a few hours of sleep, it felt very inviting. "Are you as tired as I am?" I asked Sherlock.

"No," he answered. "Old people are often tired, right?" He smirked at me as he turned on the TV.

_Fair enough_, I thought to myself as I pulled back the blankets. "So I'm guessing you don't care to join me, then?" I used my best flirtatious voice.

Across the room from me, Sherlock smiled. He got in bed beside me and our gazes met. I pulled him into my arms and kissed him. He relaxed against me as I reached my hand into those soft, dark curls. It felt like way more than a day since we last kissed, more like years. "John," Sherlock moaned against my mouth, and feelings stirred inside me. That deep voice though, saying my name, drove me crazy. He reached a hand under my shirt, and my heart fluttered as I felt his hand on my bare skin. I moaned into the kiss as he unbuttoned my shirt, tossing it somewhere in the room. I realized this was the first time he saw me shirtless, and it made me feel self-conscious, but he didnt seem particularly disgusted.

"I love you," he said, our gazes meeting.

"I love you, too," I told him, pulling him down for another kiss.

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**AN: Sorry I haven't updated in so long! Review please? Updates soon :) **


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